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Thank You, O Lord for making the evil in myself, to show itself! Thank You for giving me to remember what Xmeah taught us about saying, "Unto the Prisoners; Go Forth!" Thank You for the constant purging of more evil! I saw something in myself that I hated! I saw how I got moved! I saw how my emotions were being dictated to! I also saw how I reacted to things and I hated this way that I saw in myself! I cursed this! I did not want to see this again! When the Lord started to speak to us, on the First Day of the week, which is Sunday, about getting rid of that old "nigger" that is in us, I see how that did pertain to me, too! There are old ways that are in us, that we have had, since our childhood up that we have kept. After baptism, the nature still remained in us, that made us do the things that we did in the past!

Before my baptism, I was a hot head. I would lose my cool real easy and react in violence, if someone pissed me off! I was forgiven for my sins, at baptism, but what about that evil nature that caused me to lose my temper?

I saw a situation last week, where a joke was being played on me, but I did not know that the man was playing a joke on me, because he seemed so serious and I started to get very angry! Then the man patted me on the back and said he was just playing with me. Someone else had told him to play that joke on me and everyone was laughing but I felt bad because I had become so furious with this man! I apologized to him for that, and we went our ways. But this bothered me for days, that I could be moved so easily, like that! What was lacking in me? Why was I not aware that this was just a joke? Why did I become so angry so fast? This all happened very fast, and I hated that I did not respond the right way!

It had been several situations like that, where things were done to me, in a joking way, but it was provoking me a little at a time, to anger!

I hate the fact that my emotions could be manipulated like that so easily!

But blessed are You, O Lord, my help, Who has helped me to overcome! After seeing my falling to this evil, another opportunity was given to me, where I saw how the evil was trying to get me to become very angry!

Recently I had purchased a carpet cleaner to help keep our carpets clean in our house. One day the carpet cleaner started to not work anymore. It progressively got worse. So I contacted the company and they said I had to take it to a repair shop! But the closest repair shop was an hour away. The first time, my husband took it, with our oldest daughter. Then the next day when it was ready, we all went. After coming back, I had not tried the steam cleaner, but I was told that it worked.

Then after a few days I tried it, and to my surprise, it still did not work! It was doing the same thing as it had done before! I felt this urge, to be the way that I used to be and call these people and tell them off! It was a pushing to go into my old violent way again! But blessed is the Lord, Who caused me to stop, calm down and then call, with a clear mind! The evil spirits were there talking to me, trying to tell me that if I get "ghetto" with them, (in other words, get all mean and ugly, acting like a nigger) that I can get what I want done and probably get a new cleaner! But I also considered how I feel, when we fix a computer and something happens and the customer comes back. I do not like to be yelled at and I do not want to yell at anyone else! So, I called to find out what happened and not jump to any conclusions!

It was wonderful for me, because in speaking with the man I did learn something that could have been the problem and I tried it, but it still did not work. So then I called the company of the cleaner to see what we could do to get it fixed, and without me having to drive an hour over and back to get this fixed. Because with the price of gas, and having to go back and forth, I could buy a brand new one!

But the evil spirits still were trying to get me hot, and when I called the company, twice, each time the phone got disconnected, after I told them my story of what had happened! This was just more provoking, trying to get me to become unglued! But again, the Lord help my peace, because I called on Him for help with this situation.

Finally, the third time I was able to get through and I explained to the lady what had happened and she told me that they are going to mail me a brand new machine, since it is not convenient for me to travel so far to get it repaired! I was amazed and very thankful that I did not have to use evil ways to get what I wanted. I am very thankful to the Lord for His Help in keeping my mind in His Perfect Peace and for not allowing me to be moved again, like I had seen myself, so many times before! Blessed are You, O Lord God, my Help!

You are truly worthy to be praised for all that You do for us!

You cause us to see things about ourselves so that these evil natures and ways can be destroyed from us! Amen!

God does Not Speak To Condemn Us!

Out of all the things that the Lord tells us, through the mouth of His Preacher, nothing is ever said to condemn us! The Word comes to correct us and to wash us! Thank You, Lord for having me not to feel condemned when the Word is spoken to me, telling me the things that I have done wrong! Amen!

Go To: 228^th Day!